Finding the Right Words
by misslunafoliejackson
Summary: First year, third year, fifth year…each moment with Teddy Lupin becomes a letter Victoire writes. To whom, she's not sure, until her sixth year at Hogwarts when everything suddenly becomes clear to her. OR the one where Victoire is slowly figuring out how she feels about a certain aqua-haired boy, and it takes a short seven years to do so.


**A/N:** **So this is my first ever published fanfic! It's also my first completed one, actually. I pretty much hate the entire beginning because I wrote it when I was like eleven and it's soo cringey. Honestly, someday I'll probably go through and edit this entire thing, and probably rewrite a few parts, but I just wanted to get it up here. It's not my best writing, but I guess I'm proud of it.**

There are plenty of moments that have occurred throughout my life where the details are rather hazy to me. Parts of the scene are missing, or the dialogue is not exact. However, there is one memory that is sharper than a needle point. Every breath, every word, every movement—all of it is embedded into my mind, never to be forgotten. And at some point, I decided that it would stay unforgotten. Thus convincing me to write down, retell this memory, and the many others that have been sparked by this one. So now I will tell you of a day that changed my life, leading to many more life-changing days. I am going to tell you of the very first time I met Teddy Lupin.

It was Christmas Eve at the Burrow. Every Christmas is sort of like a family reunion with my dad's side of the family, the Weasley side. I don't look anything like a typical Weasley. My younger brother Louis and I both inherited my mother's veela looks—slight, with silvery-blond hair and pale skin. My sister Dominique has a much more Weasley-esque look about her, with her strawberry blond hair and a delicate spray of freckles on her cheeks. But that's beside the point. Anyway, on Christmas, every member of the Weasley family gathered at Gran and Granddad Weasley's home. It was so overcrowded that eventually, Dad and a few others had to set up tents outside for some people to sleep in. Hey, we've got a pretty big family.

It was the Christmas I was ten, just a year before I was due to start at Hogwarts. In fact, I think I was the first of my cousins to start Hogwarts, so at the time, none of us were in school yet. I went to the Burrow with my father and siblings three days before Christmas to help Gran and Granddad. Over the next two days, Uncle Percy and Aunt Audrey came with Molly and Lucy, Uncle George and Aunt Angelina came with Fred and Roxanne, Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione came with Rosie and Hugo, and so on. I bet if I tried to go through everyone who came, I'd be writing for quite a long time. So let's cut to the chase. On Christmas Eve, the Potters came.

Now, because Aunt Ginny was the only daughter Gran ever had, her family is the only one not surnamed Weasley. Not that it's anything to be ashamed of. In fact, I think anyone descended from Harry Potter should be proud. Not that I'm not proud of being a Weasley. I'm just saying.

With Ginny and Harry came my cousins Lily, Albus, and James, who at the time were two, four, and five. However, someone else came too. I remember standing over by the Christmas tree, hanging ornaments. The Potters came through the door, meeting a chorus of greetings. I said hello to everyone, then returned to the tree. When people had cleared, I saw, standing uncomfortably behind Uncle Harry, was a boy who looked about eleven years. He had a shock of aqua hair and warm brown eyes that drew me to him instantly. He wasn't one of Harry and Ginny's sons, but…who was he? I was too shy to ask. So instead I tried completely to ignore the tugging feeling in my gut.

"Hi, Lily!" I said, hugging her.

"Hi, Toire!" She said. She'd been too young to say my name, so that's what she called me.

"Would you like to help me decorate?" I asked, and she nodded enthusiastically. So I hung up all the fragile, glass ornaments, and handed Lily the smaller ones to hang. When that was finished, I sat down to talk to my cousin Lucy, who was about six. The great thing about our family Christmases is that I always had someone to talk to. In fact, sometimes, rather than speaking, I would simply listen. And watch.

For instance, as I looked around the room, I saw Uncle Harry and Uncle Ron standing at Gran's sink, peeling a heaping pile of sprouts with knives, and laughing. Uncle George walked into the kitchen, and Uncle Ron mimed throwing his knife at the empty space next to Uncle George. For reasons unknown to me, this cause tears to slide down the cheeks of the three men, and they sat down, conversing seriously. For a moment I wondered why, and was tempted to ask, but just then my attention was directed elsewhere.

Maman was doing her usual imitation of one of Gran's favorite singers, Celestina Warbeck, a family tradition that had us all laughing every time, even Gran. Apparently the tradition started when most of my aunts and uncles were only about sixteen or seventeen, just barely a year before my parents got married. Dad said that Gran always played Celestina Warbeck on the wireless, and the first Christmas Maman spent with them, she decided to mock the witch's performance. At first, according to Dad, Gran did not find it in the least amusing, but now she laughs and claps along with everyone else. It's quite a show to see my mother flouncing about the room, tossing her hair and belting out songs like, "A Cauldron Full of Hot, Strong Love," and "You Charmed the Heart Right Out of Me."

When Gran offered to let anyone who wanted to help bake cookies, my cousins and I scrambled and squabbled to get into the kitchen. Everyone knew that the first one always got a lick of the dough. When the cookies were baked and everyone was munching on them and chatting away, I sat in silence, noticing another who did the same. That boy, with the turquoise hair, stood off to the side, near the coatrack, as though hoping no one would notice. Instantly I could tell he felt out of place. Of course he would. Anyone who'd never had Christmas with us before would. But I didn't want him to feel that way. I wanted him to feel welcome. More importantly, I wanted to at least know his name.

When the last of the eggnog had been drained from the glasses, and yawns began to fill the air, everyone got the message that it was time to head to bed. It was nearly eleven o'clock, and many of the youngest of the Weasley-Potter clan were already dozing off. Slowly, the sitting room emptied, until I was the only one left. Or so I thought. Figuring I might as well get some rest, I followed my mother upstairs, who was carrying my little brother Louis.

I sat up in the camp bed, unable to lie down and sleep. Something was bothering me, and I knew what it was. I just needed to think about it. So I bundled into my dressing gown and tiptoed down the winding staircase, careful not wake any of my family members. Lightly, I pushed open the front door and stepped out onto the white sheet that blanketed the valley. For some reason, I didn't mind the cold. Instead, I made my way across the yard and settled under a tall, sloping tree, leaning against its smooth bark. I thought I was alone, but that thought vanished quickly when I saw a dark figure stumbling out onto the lawn. I braced myself, but as the figure drew closer, I relaxed, seeing that it was only the mysterious boy. Soon, he came close enough for me to stare closely into his amber eyes. He watched me from a few feet away, then came closer, closer until he was sitting under the tree as well, directly across from me. I didn't speak, and neither did he. We simply stared, quite unsure of what to do.

"I've been watching you all night," the boy's smooth, clear voice broke the silence.

Well, that's not creepy in any way. "How…nice," I remarked. "Umm…may I ask…who are you?" I watched for any changes in facial expression. None.

"Teddy," the boy said. "Teddy Lupin." Lupin…

"You're—you're the son of Remus and Tonks, am I right? I've heard lots about them from my parents and my aunts and uncles."

The boy's face hardened. "Yes, they were my parents. I never knew them. My godfather tells me great things about them, but…I've always wished I could see it firsthand."

I nodded, unsure of what to say. "I…I'm really sorry. Honestly. From what I've heard, they were great people."

"Yep," he said. "From what I've heard, too." We sat in the cold, snowy silence, until it was broken by Teddy. "I live with my grandmother," he said, "And I visit with my godfather, Harry, all the time. But I always feel…so alone."

I reached out my hand until it touched his. "But you're not," I whispered, squeezing his hand. It was surprisingly warm, and I felt all the tension and worry and sadness between us just melting away. It was just Teddy and me, in the icy air. And even though I was sitting there, sitting with this eleven-year-old boy, who I'd only met that very day, somehow, nothing else mattered. It was like lightning had struck and left me with something different, something unique, something truly amazing…it had left me with Teddy Lupin.

xXxXx

It was a bit less than a year later, my first day of Hogwarts. Maman gave me a kiss, and whispered, "Good luck, dear." She kissed me on the top of my head.

"Bye," I replied. " See you at Christmas."

I gave my father a hug as well. "Bye, Dad," I said. Then I gave my nine-year-old sister, Dominique, a kiss. "See you soon," I said to her.

She looked up at me with pleading eyes. "You'll write us letters, right?"

I nodded. "Of course." I gave Louis a hug, and then, tugging my trunk, I boarded the Hogwarts Express.

I wandered down the aisles, searching for a place to sit, not paying attention the people in the seats. Suddenly, there was a sharp rap on glass to my left. I jumped and turned. Teddy Lupin was sitting with a few other boys. His face was pressed against the glass, housing an expression I could not quite read, and he beckoned to me. Warily, I stepped closer, and opened the door. It had seemed an alright idea in the moment, but the very minute I sat down, it was completely strange. The other boys in the compartment, about three of them, eyed me, wearily or suspiciously, I couldn't tell. Teddy…well…he looked me straight in the eye, his brown on my blue, and I stared back. He held his gaze for just a few moments before dropping it to his lap, cheeks burning red. Mine felt very similar, so in a search for something to serve as a distraction, I rummaged in my trunk for a book, pulling out the first one I caught hold of. _Hogwarts, a History_. Excellent. I just couldn't wait to dive into an endless drone of the history behind my thousand-year-old school. (Sarcasm) Aunt Hermione, apparently, quoted this book constantly, which doesn't make it anymore exciting to me. I flipped to a random page, and began reading about the housing of poltergeists and ghosts at Hogwarts. Excellent. I've always wanted to attend a haunted school.

Eventually I got bored (who couldn't?) and lifted my eyes, scanning the small space. There were two boys next to Teddy, one of whom had crossed to the other side to make room for me. One had light brown hair and bluish eyes, the other pale straw hair and a face as pale as milk, eyes the same. The boy on my bench had reddish-blond hair, much like my sister's, and brown eyes. Finally, the silence became too uncomfortable for me to handle, so I broke it.

"So, Teddy…" I started off, searching for something to say. He looked up, somewhat startled, at the mention of his name. "Er - what year are you in again?"

"Third," he replied.

Okay…I needed to find some other type of conversation. Not the weather, not the weather… I told myself. "Um…could you tell me a bit about the classes?"

At this, Teddy seemed to brighten a little. "Yes, of course. There's Charms, which is where you'll learn just about every spell you'll need to know. Transfiguration, well, it's exactly as it sounds. Potions is decent, if you don't mind old Professor Slughorn…he's a fine man, but he's incredibly old…he taught in my father's day! Then there's Defense Against the Dark Arts, my father used to teach it…" he trailed off, staring at his shoes. "Anyway, it's rather fascinating. You'll probably enjoy it, if you're like your father, Bill." And with that he said no more.

The rest of the ride was…uneventful. Teddy made small talk with the other boys, and I gazed out the window at the landscape rushing by, as the blue sky gradually faded to light pink. A plump old witch came by with a cart of snacks, from which Teddy told me I must sample a pumpkin pasty. He said the ones on the Hogwarts Express are the best, and I can tell you from experience that he is 100% correct. The five us swapped chocolate frog cards, and when I ripped open mine, I was surprised by what I saw.  
"Hey, Teddy, look at this!" I read the card out loud.  
"Ronald Bilius Weasley, born 1st of March, 1980. He is currently married to Hermione Weasley, née Granger. He is probably best known for assisting his best friend, Harry Potter, in defeating the Dark Lord."  
Teddy laughed. "It's your uncle Ron! I'd forgotten, Harry told me that he, Ron, and Hermione all got their own cards. If you don't mind, may I keep that one?"  
"Of course. You don't know how many times Uncle Ron has bragged about having his own card."  
We laughed and I handed him the card. He examined it quickly before tucking it into his pocket. Soon he began chatting with his friends, and I reached into my trunk for a piece of parchment and a quill. I dipped the quill in ink and began dictating a letter, although to whom, I'm not sure.

 _September 1st, 2011  
Dear…I left that part blank, since I didn't actually know who I was writing to.  
It's the first day of school. I got on the Hogwarts Express, searching for a seat. Teddy Lupin gestured for me to join him in his compartment, so I did. It was strange at first. I've only met Teddy once before, at Christmas last year, but we'd only exchanged a few words. So naturally it's been a bit awkward. Teddy told me about some of the classes, and we swapped chocolate frog cards, but now it's strange all over again. He's talking to his friends and I'm sitting in the corner, unsure of what to do. Is this how it's always going to be? I mean, Teddy and I aren't friends. At least not yet. I haven't even developed a proper opinion of him. I guess I'll just have to wait and see. I mean, things change over time, right?  
Sincerely,  
Victoire_

It was short, but that didn't matter. It wasn't as though I was going to be mailing it, anyway. I folded it up and tucked it away in my trunk. I looked up, suddenly aware of the silence that had settled upon our compartment. All four boys were staring at me. I felt my cheeks flush a brilliant pink.

"What?" I asked, feeling incredibly self-conscious.

"Well…" Teddy said, evidently embarrassed himself. "It's just that…we're almost to the school. And…we should probably change into our robes. Which means…"

"Oh." Realization dawned on me. "I-um…I'll go find another compartment. With a girl."

And with that I grabbed my robes and left. I found a compartment with a girl named Penelope, and once I was changed, I returned to where the boys were. They too had changed into their robes, and the atmosphere was not quite as awkward as it had been minutes before. The four boys were clowning around, tossing something back and forth, yelling like hooligans. I rolled my eyes and took my seat, picking up my copy of A History of Magic. I'll admit, while I previously had no intention of studying history, I found that it actually was rather interesting. I read for the remainder of the trip, while the boys engaged in whatever else thirteen-year-old wizard boys do.

When the train pulled into Hogsmeade station, it was a mad dash to the exit. I was instructed to leave my trunk the train, and so I wandered into the sea of students. I found Penelope, the girl who'd let me change in her compartment, and together we boarded one of the tiny rowboats first years were supposed to arrive at Hogwarts in. The lake glittered in an eerie sort of way, but that made me even more excited. Penelope and I chatted excitedly about what house we might be sorted into as we paddled closer and closer to the silhouette of Hogwarts in the distance. Secretly I didn't think I could ever be sorted into Gryffindor like the rest of my family (besides Maman, of course). I didn't think I was that brave—I didn't feel like I was that brave. If anything, I'd be a Ravenclaw or maybe a Hufflepuff.

Before I knew it we had arrived at the castle. I, along with the other first-years, exited the boats and followed the half-giant Rubeus Hagrid into the castle, where we were met by Headmistress McGonagall. The first-years gathered in the Great Hall, and I watched as Teddy took his seat at the Hufflepuff table. Truth be told, I had no idea which house I wanted to be sorted into. Every Weasley, including my father, had been sorted into Gryffindor. My mum went to Beaxbatons, obviously, so I didn't have anything else to go by. All I could hope was that I didn't disappoint my family.

It's true that I hadn't really realized just how far to the end of the alphabet Weasley is until I sat through at least 80 other names being called. Penelope Duplo, the girl I'd met on the train, had been sorted into Ravenclaw. Before I knew it, "Weasley, Victoire" had been called. I stumbled up to the stool, where the hat was slipped over my eyes.  
 _Ah, Miss Weasley. The very first of the new generation. How excited I am to sort you._

Not going to lie, hearing his voice in person for the first time was slightly unnerving, even after hearing all my relatives describe their sorting experiences. The Hat's voice was frosty and yet crackled like fire. In a word, indescribable.

 _My, you come from a long line of Weasleys. But there's a chance you mayn't be like the rest. Clearly you've got courage, but enough for Gryffindor? No._ I will admit, my heart dropped just a bit when he said this. I wasn't good enough for Gryffindor? No Weasley had ever been told that. But perhaps he was right.

 _Ah, disappointed? I thought you would be. My apologies, dear Victoire, but I only want the best house for you. Most certainly not Slytherin…but Hufflepuff…_  
I immediately thought to Teddy. I didn't love Hufflepuff, but being in the same house as Teddy wouldn't be so bad…

 _Oh, I see, you have a preference…however, I don't think Hufflepuff is the place for you. I guess it had better be…RAVENCLAW!_

Well, Ravenclaw wasn't bad at all. I'd kind of automatically assumed I'd be in Gryffindor, given my family history, but hey, Ravenclaw meant I was smart. Nice. Plus, I was in the same house as Penelope. I wasn't with Teddy, but he was a third year anyway. I wouldn't have seen him that much regardless. I took my seat next to Penelope.  
After dinner we were shown to our dormitories. Having not known anyone in Ravenclaw, except for maybe Aunt Luna, I had no idea what to expect. Let me just say, the Ravenclaw dormitories and common room are about the most exquisitely beautiful places. But that night I was so tired, I barely had time to notice. As soon as I reached my room, I hit the silk pillowcase and fell asleep.

xXxXx

My first year went by rather quickly, with almost no real interactions with Teddy. He said hi to me in the hallways, of course, and he and his grandmother spent Christmas with us once again, but nothing real happened. You know what I mean. This is about my relationship with Teddy, and nothing in my first year happened that's worth including. Second year wasn't much either. In fact, it wasn't until I was in third year and he was in fifth that sparks started to fly between us. (Yes, I'm cheesy. Deal with it.)

Okay, I know I said nothing happened in second year, but the truth was that Teddy and I slowly became better friends. By October of my third year, seeing each other wasn't awkward. After two years, it was just natural. Then Teddy asked me to go to Hogsmeade with him.

Now, just so we're clear, it wasn't like, on a date or anything. In fact, he hadn't exactly asked me. He'd just asked if I was going to Hogsmeade, and when I told him I was, he said that we should meet up. But thirteen-year-old-me was too confused to think completely logically, and I freaked out to Penelope on the way there. "What will he want to talk about? What if I make myself look stupid?"

"Relax," Penelope reassured me. "He just wants to hang out. As friends. Because that's all you are. Just friends." At the time, I'd been too distracted to notice it, but it almost seemed as though Penelope was reassuring herself more than she was me.

What was I worried about anyway? Teddy and I were friends. We'd hung out before, and this wasn't any different. In the very depths of my mind, though, I felt as though it was. I entered the Three Broomsticks, trying not to draw attention to myself. Teddy had said he'd be in a booth near the back, so I wandered towards there till I caught sight of his aqua hair. I slid into the seat across from him.

"Hey, Victoire!" He smiled brightly. "I was wondering where you'd gotten off to."

I laughed nervously. The great thing about Teddy was that he could make anyone comfortable, no matter the circumstance. We chatted aimlessly about classes and the weather and anything, really. We both ordered butterbeers with extra foam and we both ended up with whipped cream mustaches. It was so much fun, and I left the Three Broomsticks in the brisk October wind feeling like I was glowing.

Back in my dormitory, I pulled out my parchment and quill to write. Over the last two years I'd made a habit of writing letters, specifically whenever something had happened with Teddy. I'd found it was like a diary, a good outlet for my feelings.

 _One word: glowing. That's how I feel right now. Teddy and I went to the Three Broomsticks. Yes, I know, it's not a big deal, but considering how nervous I was, it was pretty great, and not at all awkward. I can't believe I was so freaked out! I mean, here I was, lamenting over this for a week, ranting to Penelope, and nothing embarrassing or awful even happened. Now that I think about, why was I even nervous in the first place? I mean, this is Teddy. I've known him for three years. We're friends. It shouldn't be awkward. It wasn't awkward. It was especially funny, though, when Teddy and I got whipped cream all over our faces. We both laughed so hard._

This became our tradition for the next two years, although it didn't always end well. That's for later, though. Right now I've got to talk about the Yule Ball, in my fourth year.

I know what you're thinking. No, we did not hold the Triwizard Tournament. But Professor McGonagall thought it would be a good "bonding experience" for the students. She even invited the students from Durmstrang and Beauxbatons, which was nice because I got to see Dom. Anyway, about a week before the ball, I was standing outside the great hall, chatting with my sister, when Teddy walked up.

"Hey, Dom," He greeted. Then he turned to me. "Hey, do you want to go to the Yule Ball with me? It can be just as friends if you want. I don't really care. But what do you say?"

I stared, speechless. Teddy was asking me to the Yule Ball? Why? He looked at me, waiting for an answer.

"Uh…yes, sure, of course. And, as friends, if you'd like."

Teddy nodded. "Okay, that's what I thought." He caught himself. "That you'd want to go as friends. Not that you'd say yes. I didn't know that." Then he turned and walked off in the other direction, muttering to himself.

Dominique giggled. "Smooth."

I shoved her lightly. "Shut up."

The night of the ball was nerve-wracking, to say the least. At 5:30 I stood in front off the full length mirror in our dormitory, staring at myself. I wore a knee-length light pink dress that complimented my long silvery-blond hair. Nellie wore a dark green dress that looked rather stunning with her strawberry blonde hair. From the corner of my eye, I noticed her watching me with an envious sort of glint in her eye. I didn't ask, though, and we walked down the Great Hall together. We stopped in front of the doors, and, inhaling simultaneously, stepped through.

Oh, it was definitely breathtaking. So stunning I couldn't possibly describe it in words, or a picture, or anything. I'd never seen the Great Hall like this before, and I couldn't help but wonder why they didn't hold this ball more often. I looked to my right to see Teddy, whose turquoise hair clashed with his silvery-gray dress robes. We locked eyes, and he grinned and sidled up to me. "You're looking rather fine this evening, Miss Weasley."

My cheeks flushed pink, but I smiled. "Why thank you. You're not looking too bad yourself, Mister Lupin."

Teddy took my hand and we danced. It was around 11 that Teddy whispered in my ear, "Did you hear? They've got a garden area set up outside, same as the last time they held the Yule Ball." And, grasping my hand, he pulled me outside. We wove through the shrubbery maze until we found a secluded area and sat down on a stone bench. Snowflakes began to fall, creating a perfect scene.

"Hey," Teddy said softly. "Remember the last time we were out in the snow alone together?"

I smiled. "How could I not? It was the first time we met, after all."

"Gosh, has it really been four years? It feels like a long time, but at the same time…no time at all." Teddy looked into my eyes and smiled.

I know what you're thinking, and no, we did not kiss. Well, not really, anyway. Teddy just sort of planted a light kiss on my cheek, and that was that. Well, almost. With the snow falling lightly around us, it did feel kind of magical.

That night I sat up in my bed, scribbling a new letter on a fresh piece of parchment.

 _Teddy asked me to the Yule Ball, and I'll admit I was a bit nervous and confused at first. I mean, out of all the girls at the school, why would Teddy pick me? Even if we did go as friends. Friends indeed, he kissed my cheek! What am I supposed to think about that? Nothing, I guess, I mean it was a friendly gesture more than it was romantic. If Teddy had wanted it to be romantic, he would've kissed me for real. And for the sake of our friendship I'm glad that he didn't. Right?_

So I guess after that I had my hopes up for mine and Teddy's relationship. Over the course of that year, I think my feelings for Teddy began to get stronger. For the first time, I didn't deny that my feelings for Teddy were more than just those of two friends. And that's what scared me the most.

I didn't spend as much time with Teddy in the next few months, but that was mainly due to our completely different schedules. Then a Hogsmeade trip came up, and I got excited. Hogsmeade was how Teddy and I had hung out for basically the past year and a half, and even though Teddy hadn't actually said anything to me, I kind of assumed we'd meet up at the Three Broomsticks like always.

So imagine my surprise when I walk past the window on my way to the door, only to see Teddy sitting at the booth with another girl. I had gone to Hogsmeade alone, Nellie had plans (plans? Seriously? We're best friends, for Pete's sake.) and Rachel and Alessia, the other girls in my dormitory, were staying at school. Curious as to who else could be with Teddy, I turned and pressed my face to the glass, examining the girl. Her strawberry-blonde ponytail swung around and I saw her face. I gasped. It was Nellie.

My best friend blew me off for my maybe-sort-of-possible crush and longtime friend?! Well I mean, it's not like Nellie could've known. And Teddy obviously. But it would explain why Teddy had been avoiding me like the plague that week, and why Nellie had been so vague about her plans for the weekend. I couldn't believe it.

Of course, it was possible that they just wanted a chance to hang out without me around. But when I looked at them, I saw Nellie giggle and Teddy swung his arm around her, pulling her close. Okay, Teddy had never done that to me (aside from that whole kissing-on-the-cheek-thing). It was official—there was something going on between them—and I hated it.

I didn't even stay for the rest of the day. I stomped home in the chilly spring air and once I was back at school, I threw myself onto my bed and did the only thing I could think of—I wrote another letter.

 _If I could describe how I feel right now in a color, it would be red. Hot, burning, angry red. Mixed with some blue sadness and gray betrayal. Why do I feel betrayed? Because Nellie went on a possible date with Teddy! Oh goodness, I'm a terrible friend. Am I? I mean, I SHOULD be upset at them. Especially Nellie, for going out with Teddy and not bothering to tell me. And Teddy! The nerve of him, asking me to the Yule Ball, KISSING ME on the CHEEK, basically blatantly ignoring me, and then going out with my best friend! I'm seething with rage as of now. It's just…I know I shouldn't be mad at either of them. They do have every right to go out together, without me. I guess…I guess the real reason I'm upset isn't because I feel betrayed, it's because…I feel jealous?_

I sighed, not knowing what to do. I packed away my letter and writing supplies and changed into my pajamas, falling dramatically back onto my bed. When I checked the time, it was only 4:30. I had some homework, but that could wait…I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

I woke up next to Nellie clomping in, her hair tangled and cheeks flushed from the wind. She had the biggest grin on her face, and when she spoke, it was like she was a fairy ringing bells or something weirdly floaty like that. "Oh gosh, I just had the most amazing afternoon…" she trailed off, looking at me (nervously or expectantly? I couldn't tell).

I bit back my resentment and smiled. "Really? What did you do?" I waited to see if she'd tell me the truth or not, given how secretive she'd been before.

Just as I expected, Nellie hesitated. Finally she said, "I was at the Three Broomsticks. With…a friend." A friend?! Seriously? Since when were she and Teddy so chummy all of a sudden?

"Oh, really? Who? Anyone I know?"

Nellie bit her lip and said, "Um…yes, actually, er…Teddy Lupin?"

I felt slightly better knowing that at least Nellie was honest and truthful and didn't try to lie or avoid answering because frankly, that would've been even worse. I put on a faux smile and said, "Oh, that's…nice. Did you two have fun?"

Nellie seemed to relax slightly, knowing that I was (or at least appeared to be) okay with it. "Yes, actually, lots. We had a drink at the Three Broomsticks and then we went to Honeydukes and actually, Teddy's asked me on a second date next week…" Nellie faltered, her eyes growing wide, like she'd just let slip the secrets of the universe.

"How nice," I managed. "Er, I think I'm going to sleep now, it's quite late…"

"Victoire, it's only 6:45."

I cursed inwardly for not checking the time. "Yes, but I'm very tired, long day, you know? I should really sleep. See you tomorrow, Nellie." And that was that.

xXxXx

It became clear by the next week that Penelope Duplo was dating Teddy Lupin. The entirety of fourth and sixth years were talking about it, which I didn't understand because honestly it wasn't that big of a deal. Yeah, sure, she was a fourth year and he was in sixth, and yeah, she was a Ravenclaw and he was a Hufflepuff but really. Other than that, I couldn't understand why everyone was so hyped about it. Then, two weeks later, I found out.

I was in the library, browsing the history section. I'd become very interested in history in the last few years, to the point where I read history books for fun. Anyway, as I walked further down the aisle, I heard voices growing louder.

"—crazy, isn't it?" Someone asked.

"Without a doubt," the other voice agreed. "I mean, who would've thought? I always thought Teddy would end up with Victoire Weasley, not her best friend."

The other voice sighed. "Yeah, you're not the only one who thought that."

I blanched. People thought I should be dating Teddy? How messed up is that? Suddenly I thought of something. If Nellie found out, she'd hate me, not to mention she'd feel really hurt. So I arrived back to my dorm with baited breath, hoping Nellie hadn't heard. Thankfully, she hadn't, and I don't think she ever did at all while she and Teddy were dating.

They dated for…hmm…I want to say, 3 months? Maybe 4? I honestly didn't keep track. I didn't want to keep track. But I do know they started dating sometime in February, and I do remember Nellie coming to me in tears that May telling me she and Teddy had broken up. She never did tell me exactly who ended it, but I always had the slightest suspicion that Teddy was the one who dumped her. I couldn't believe it, but as guilty as I felt, I was almost happy that they'd broken up. Okay, scratch that, I was very happy they'd broken up. Sue me, I'm a terrible friend, but it's not as though I can control my own feelings. So the two weeks after their breakup I spent in a gloriously happy high, all while trying to pull Nellie through her equally miserable time.

xXxXx

Somehow I made it through fourth year without any more "complications". Then fifth year came around and Teddy was in seventh and it was the first year that Teddy and I didn't really hang out. I'd seen him less and less in fourth year, and to be honest, I really think Nellie made things awkward between us, and for a while a resented her for that. Yes, Nellie was my best friend, but it wasn't fair of her to come between someone so important to me, even if it was unintentional. And in case you're wondering, for the remainder of fourth year and all throughout I kept writing letters. And that was actually what got me into a hell of a lot of trouble.

This was November of my fifth year, just after Halloween. My last letter was from Halloween, when Teddy had asked me if I wanted to get a butterbeer after dinner and we'd spent about an hour in the Hufflepuff common room, chatting airily and drinking. It had been a major point in our interactions since, well, the Yule Ball pretty much. So of course I'd written about it. And I didn't really think much of that afterwards. But then I came back to our dormitory, only to find Nellie sitting on my bed, eyes glued to several pieces of parchment in her hands. With a jolt, I realized they were my letters.

Nellie was reading one with a horrified (or furious?) expression on her face. I noticed her eyes were red. Had she been crying?

She suddenly realized I was standing there, and she shot up from the bed, the remaining letters falling off the sheets and fluttering to the ground. "How could you?" Nellie's eyes flashed with anger.

"How could I what?" The best thing to do was assume I knew nothing.

"Don't play stupid with me, Victoire Apolline Weasley. You wrote these—these letters about Teddy, and how much you hated our relationship! The best three months of my life!" Tears ran down her cheeks.

And then I was mad. "Penelope, you have no right to be upset, considering the fact that those letters were private! They were like my diary, and you had no right to read them! How did you even find those?"

Penelope reddened a bit, and I knew that she had secretly known she shouldn't have read them. "I…I was looking for your potions textbook, since I couldn't find mine and I figured you wouldn't mind if I borrowed yours. So I started rummaging through your trunk and these fell out. They were wrapped in string and I didn't know what they were so I took the first one out and started reading it." She took a deep breath. "I…I knew I shouldn't have. I knew it was wrong. But I just couldn't help myself. I realized they were about Teddy and I got even curiouser. And then I read about the letters from when we were dating…and I got upset. I'm sorry, Victoire."

I stared. One minute she was screaming at me, the next she was apologizing? Hormones, clearly. But I couldn't just ignore her apology. It was the right thing of her to do, after all, even if it was spawned from doing the wrong thing. "Thank you for apologizing, Nellie. And…I'm sorry I was jealous of you and Teddy. I should have been a better friend about that. And I should forgive you for reading my letters, but…that's going to take some time. Not a long time, but some time all the same. Especially since you should've known. I trusted you, after all."

Nellie hung her head. "I know, and I completely understand. I don't deserve for you to trust me after this." She was quiet for a moment. "Victoire…were you actually mad at me for going out with Teddy? And happy when we broke up?"

I sighed. "A little, yes, but I'm over that. It doesn't matter anymore."

And just like that the conversation was over. It took some time for Nellie and I to be completely over the fight, but eventually we got back to where we were before. And then suddenly Teddy was major in my life again.

xXxXx

It was Christmas. Teddy and Andromeda came to the Burrow again that year, which I was excited about. All the usual traditions took place, and after Gran put the cookies in the oven, we all sat down in the living room. While Uncle George was retelling his and Uncle Fred's escape from Hogwarts, I sat down at the foot of the tree, staring into the fire. I felt a presence next to me and turned to see Teddy Lupin. He gave me a sly grin. I'd spent enough time around Uncle George to know what that meant.

I rolled my eyes. "What did you do?" I had become so accustomed to my cousins and uncles (one uncle in particular) causing trouble throughout the years, so I had a feeling that nothing Teddy could've done would surprise me.

But Teddy simply smiled. "You'll see. Just wait until James takes a bite of his turkey leg."

And so when dinner came, everyone sat around the dining table. Gran made the blessing, and then the food was served. Sure enough, James got a leg and he eagerly picked it up to take a bite. One minute everything was peaceful. The next, there was a yellow flash and a stream of pus squirted from the plump part of the leg. James yelped and recoiled in horror (disgust, probably, too), as he threw the leg across the table. It landed on Lily's plate and she screamed and glared at James, probably because yellow-white pus was still streaming from the thing.

The adults were kind of at a loss for actions and words. Harry's face was in his hands, probably because two of his children had just completely disrupted dinner (even though it was actually Teddy who had done the disruption part of it). The younger kids were all stifling giggles behind their hands, and I turned to my left and realized Teddy had ducked under the table, he was laughing so hard. Luckily, no one noticed. Gran was muttering about how something must have gone wrong in the oven, while I kept my mouth shut.

Once everyone had gotten over the initial shock, the mess was cleaned up and dinner went on without another hitch. The mystery of who charmed James's turkey leg was never solved, and the only ones who ever knew the culprit were me and the culprit himself.

xXxXx

I think it was just after Christmas break, when we were sitting on the train going back to Hogwarts, when I had a realization. This was my last time I would be on a train to Hogwarts with Teddy. Ever since my first day, he and I had sat in a compartment together. It had become a tradition, and now the tradition was going to come to an end because Teddy was in his seventh and final year.

I swear we must have had a mental connection at that moment because he leaned over and whispered, "This is the last time we're going to Hogwarts together, you know."

I leaned back in surprise. "Yes, actually…I was just thinking about that."

"Aww," Teddy mocked. "You're going to miss me."

I scoffed. "I won't miss you. In fact, I'll actually be at peace for once."

Teddy leaned back in his seat, his arm tossed casually around my shoulders. "Oh, Victoire, don't you wish."

He wasn't wrong, you know.

xXxXx

Maybe it had to do with our exchange on the train, but the rest of fifth year went by way too fast for me. Before I knew it, I was attending Teddy's graduation ceremony. I sat in one of the golden rows with Andromeda, my parents and siblings, and all my Weasley aunts, uncles, and cousins. Everyone was excited to see Teddy graduate. With a jolt, I realized that until I was born, Teddy was technically the only child. I looked down to see Uncle Harry discreetly wiping a tear from his eye, and I realized he might not be the only adult with runaway emotions that day. Andromeda didn't even try to hide the fact that tears of pride were streaking their way down her cheeks.

I looked up on the stage to see rows of students, about one hundred and forty of them. They wore traditional plain back graduation robes (wizard-style), with matching caps (also wizard-style). I noticed many of them shifting nervously in their seats. I even caught a few teary faces and realized how emotional this actually must be. I waited somewhat impatiently for the ceremony to start.

Soon enough, Headmistress McGonagall stepped up to the podium, magnifying her voice with her wand. She went on and on about how hard the students had worked to get there, how many opportunities awaited them, etc. I didn't really pay attention though. I was more focused on Teddy, whose last name had placed him smack dab in the middle of all the students. He caught me looking and made eye contact, giving me a small smirk accompanied by a wink. I blushed a little a grinned back. Then McGonagall began calling up names. Pretty soon she got to Teddy. Instead of his usual cocky saunter, he strode up there with pride, all kidding aside. He received his diploma and returned to his seat, all traces of his previous smirk vanished. I waited patiently until the end of the ceremony, which was when my family and Andromeda would hold a graduation party for Teddy. I was excited at the prospect of not only my cousins and food, but also of possibly spending some extra time with Teddy. My wish came true just two hours later, outside of the Burrow.

Surprisingly, I found Teddy seated the beneath the tree where we very fist conversed. He had a look of…what, sadness, on his face? I couldn't tell. Silently, I sat down across from him. He looked up when he felt my presence.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," I said. "What's up?"

Teddy sighed. "Nothing, I guess…it's just that now I'm done with school, I don't really know what I want to do with my life. Where to go. What to do. Who to be. Not to mention, I'll miss Hogwarts tremendously. And…" He seemed to hesitate. "…and you."

I felt my face and insides go warm. Teddy was going to miss me? I'd never felt more special. "Well…" I said, considering my words, "You can always go back and visit Hogwarts. You could even teach there if you really wanted to. And I…I'm not going anywhere. For now, anyways." I smiled shyly at him. He returned the smile. Then, without saying anything, Teddy leaned over and hugged me. Tightly. I hugged him back and honestly, it was as peaceful and content as I'd ever felt up until then.

The summer passed so much quicker than I wanted, and before I knew it I was on the train that would take me into my sixth year. Without Teddy. It was all I could do to keep from having an emotional meltdown.

xXxXx

I was seated in a compartment with Molly, Louis, Fred, and James. I would have sat with Nellie, but she had prefect duty and wouldn't come until later. My cousins were discussing what house Fred and James would be sorted into. I wasn't paying attention though. I couldn't stop thinking about Teddy. Eventually, though, I knew what to do. I was surprised I hadn't thought of it sooner.

I reached into my trunk and pulled out a quill, ink pot, and a roll of parchment. Looking at the materials before me, I sighed. I hadn't written one in so long. I picked up the quill and pressed it to the paper.

 _I can't stop thinking about Teddy. I miss him so much. We always sat in the same compartment on the train, but now it's just me and my cousins. And what I am I supposed to do in Hogsmeade without him to make a stupid comment about whipped cream all over my face? Or in the Hufflepuff common room while we help each other study? How am I even supposed to get through this year? Teddy's always been around to talk to, when I'm having a bad day or I just need to relax. Now he's off in London looking for a job, and I'm just another girl who's still in school. I can write to him, sure…but it's not really the same I guess. I don't want to know what it's like not to be around Teddy all the time. I've had a little crush on Teddy for a while now, but I think…I think I might be in love with him. I really think I might be in love with Teddy Lupin._

Two days later, I sat up in my dormitory. My classmates were holding a first day of classes party, but I didn't really want to join them. I needed a way to rid my mind of Teddy. The only way to do that, though, was to tell him how I really felt. But how was I supposed to do that? Floo powder? Write him a letter? And anyway, no matter how many times I rehearsed them in my head, I just couldn't seem to find the right words to tell him how I felt. I sat on my bed, staring out the window at the stars glittering in the night sky.

Suddenly, I knew exactly how to tell Teddy how I felt. I rummaged through my trunk, pulling out six years' worth of letters. I finally knew who I was writing to. Hastily I grabbed a quill and scribbled Teddy's name in all the blank spaces. In the last letter, the one I'd written just days ago, I scratched out _sincerely_ and wrote _love_. Then I folded them neatly, one by one, in order, and bound them with some string. I tied them to Beau's leg and watched him fly off.

The next morning at breakfast I received a note. It was only two words, with no signature. _Me too._ It was only two words, but it was all I needed.

 **One year later**

Seventh year. I couldn't believe that in just minutes, I would board the Hogwarts express and begin my seventh and final year at Hogwarts. Time passed so quickly. I was seriously having trouble processing. I stood apart from the rest of my family, wanting a bit of time to myself just to take it all in one last time.

Not five minutes had passed when I felt someone come up behind me. I turned to see the familiar brown eyes and turquoise hair of Teddy Lupin, and my heart swelled. I thought back to my very first time on the train, how he had invited me to sit with him, how awkward it had been. I couldn't believe how much we'd grown, physically, mentally, together, since then.

"Hey," he said softly, grabbing my hand. Ever since we'd professed our love to each other a year ago, all my time with him had been bliss (as sappy as that sounds, there's no other real way to describe it). Like snowflakes falling on a perfect winter night, where even though it's cold and you miss the warmth, it's beautiful and you never want it to end. "I remember standing in your place two years ago. It's hard, isn't it?"

"Definitely," I nodded. "I can't believe this is really my last time. I'm a little scared, actually."

"Don't be," Teddy said. "Don't think about what's coming next. Just savor the time you have and let time take its course."

I laughed a little. "When did you become a philosopher, Mr. Lupin?"

"Oh, I'd say around the time I met you, Miss Weasley." Before I could do or say anything, Teddy put one hand around my waist and the other on my shoulder. He leaned into me and pressed his lips onto mine.

I closed my eyes and kissed him back, hard and meaningfully yet soft and gentle and the same time. If I had ever felt amazing around Teddy before, those times were nothing compared to how I felt now. Standing there, kissing Teddy, about to start my seventh year, I couldn't think of anything that could ever compare to this.

 **The End**

 **A/N:** **So that's the end! Did you like it? If so, please review! Again, this is my first fanfic, so CONSTRUCTIVE criticism only please! Thanks!**

 **xx,**

 **luna**


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